Cry
by SelenityCosmos
Summary: Chris thinks back on why he came and on who has affected him and how.


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Cry

Author: Hoshi Tamamushiirono

Rating: If you watch Charmed you can see this.

Spoilers: Everything through "Prince Charmed"

Timeline: Night after "Prince Charmed".

Summary: Chris thinks back on why he came and on who has affected him and how.

Disclaimer: Blood is red, Orbs are blue, I don't own this, for god's sake don't sue.

If I had just one tear

Running down your cheek

Maybe I could cope

Maybe I'd get some sleep

If I had just one moment at your expense

Maybe all my misery

Would be well spent

Chris stood in the door of Wyatt's room watching Piper cuddle her son on the bed with Leo resting his head on her solder. It was a rare moment these days and Chris treasured the image of Leo and Piper alive with a sweet little Wyatt resting in their loving embrace. Chris smiled bitterly remembering many times, from when Wyatt was young to when Wyatt was fifteen, when Chris had seen this exact picture. Just the three of them as Chris watched from the doorway. As Leo stirred and began to look up, Chris Blinked away.

After Blinking up to his sanctuary on top of the Golden Gate Bridge, Chris let a single tear run down his face, thinking that this was what he must save. He let the wind sweep through his hair, as though it could sweep away him too, wishing he could pray. Chris couldn't believe enough to pray anymore, prayers were never answered, not his anyway. And as he looked down on San Francisco from the detached safety of that bridge he smiled.

Could you cry a little

Lie just a little

Pretend that you're feeling a little more pain

I gave now I'm wanting

Something in return

So cry just a little for me

In his mind's eye Chris watched as his father beamed down at his older brother, telling the older boy how glad he was that the boy was safe after Chris had saved his brother from a demon attack. His father who never once remembered to come to his birthday party, never once bothered to help Chris control his powers, and never once came when Chris called- not even when his mother died on Chris's fourteenth birthday by his sainted _brother's_ hand.

He watched as his second oldest aunt scolded his cousin for paying to much attention to him, and then turn to scolded her husband for playing favorites. When his oldest aunt pointed out that the two had only just said their hellos and that Chris was the one to open the door, the second aunt growled at her sister to stop picking on her. Chris's second aunt had then brought out a present for his older brother. The two younger aunts always had presents for him. Chris and his cousin never got gifts on a regular visit.

Chris heard the youngest aunt complain about having to teach Chris about his powers, then her saw her yelling at him for every mistake he made. He saw his brother knock her out and patiently explain what is volatile aunt was saying. He remembered being blamed for her unconscious state even though his brother adamantly told them it was he who did the damage. Chris saw her refuse to waist her time on someone with such useless powers as those Chris had.

If your love could be caged, honey, I would hold the key

And conceal it underneath the pile of lies you handed me

And you'd hunt and those lies

They'd be all you'd ever find

And that'd be all you'd have to know

For me to be fine

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And you'd cry a little

Die just a little

And baby I would feel just a little less pain

I gave now I'm wanting

Something in return

So cry just a little for me

Chris orbed up to cheek on the Elders, finding them in council. He watched Gideon stand angrily defending some witch who had killed to protect herself, inadvertently taking the demon's powers. Next to Gideon sat Leo who was very obviously not paying attention. Leo's mind was either with his wife or son. Whether the contemplations were happy or guilty Chris did not know, but he did not need to know right now, so he orbed to the echoing halls of Richard's home.

Chris peeked though the door to see Paige wrapped in Richard's embrace. The half witch looked happy, even peaceful in the soft pale light of the moon. Paige rolled in her sleep, moving away from the man that she loved, she blinked at the ceiling. When she saw the man next to her she smiled to herself and snuggled into him, asleep again in seconds. Chris smiled with her and orbed to Phoebe, who lay on the Halliwell Manor couch.

Chris knelt next to the most forgiving charmed one, allowing himself a moment to watch her sleep, then he stood. He carefully orbed a blanket on to her, telekinetically tucking the silky edge around her. Phoebe sighed softly and curled slightly murmuring a name under her breath. Chris wasn't surprised that the name wasn't Jason's, but he chuckled non-the less. Watching her sleep reminded him of his eldest aunt sometimes- so relaxed.

Give it up baby

I hear your goodbye

Nothing's gonna save me

I see it in your eyes

Some kind of heartache

Darling give it a try

I don't want pity

I just want what is mine

It had always been odd, having his oldest aunt as a whitelighter, but he had never met her when she was alive and only knew that she had been a complete mother hen. She had gotten worse. Being the eldest of the four sisters she had always felt it was her job to take car of them after their mom died, as whitelighter to her siblings children that feeling had been enhanced. Chris's oldest aunt was always there for him, always stood up for him.

Though he despised the eldest sister, Chris's uncle would join forces with her against the third sister, his wife, to protect and defend Chris. The Avatar had never chastised Chris, and Chris cherished the memory of the harsh reproving comments his uncle made to his father. Chris remembered the thankful glances that his mother shoot to the man he so admired, he remembered the looks of gratitude for the courtroom style defense that his mother gave his uncle.

His mother. There was so much that Chris remembered about the beautiful woman. Her smile that lit the room with a cheery glow begging the world to smile with her. The serene, grounded-ness in her expression that calmed her dramatic younger sisters. The graceful and quiet defiance of the Elders and their laws. The playful attitude and patience when teaching him how to cook or make potions. The feeling of her arms around him- of love.

Love. Nearly a foreign concept to Chris. The only other person who loved him was his brother. His brother still loved him. His brother who had killed his parents, aunts, uncle, and cousin. His brother who would devise new ways to torture him for information, only to heal him and apologize profusely for the pain he caused. His brother who was always there for him- no matter how evil his brother got- no matter what.

Yeah.. Could you cry a little

Lie just a little

Pretend that you're feeling a little more pain

I gave now I'm wanting

Something in return

So cry just a little for me

Chris stepped though Piper's open door to see her tossing and turning in her sleep. This protective charmed sister who had lost so much. Mother, grandmother, and sister. Phoebe had lost them too, she had even lost her husband, but she did not feel these things the way Piper did. Piper was loving and strong, but more than that she was good. Oddly at times, it seemed the she was more good than the others were and while that may have been true, it was also that Piper was just more maternal that the others- more willing to make sacrifices. Sacrifices for Wyatt.

Wyatt. Chris turned and moved in to the child's room. He bent, picking the tiny boy up, cradling Wyatt in his arms. This child who would become the greatest evil that this world has seen. Chris stood like that for hours, just enjoying this time when he and Wyatt could be alone. Could be together without any background, without any pretence, without any agenda. Hesitantly, Chris kissed Wyatt on the forehead, then returned the twice-blessed boy to his crib.

As Chris reached the door he paused, "I will save you Wyatt," he whispered softly yet fervently, "I promise my Brother."

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Cry just a little for me

Could you cry just a little for me?


End file.
